I lost my job. Not recently – at some point in the past. After once again joining the ranks of the employed, I was able to reflect on everything learned during the job search: it alarmed me. My verdict is summarized in three lessons intended for employers.
Lesson One: GPA is a false metric.
GPA? Seriously? I have a Ph.D. from one of the top research institutions in the country. I can conduct independent research, teach, write scholarly papers, and defend my findings against accomplished academics whose sole job and desire is to tear me to pieces; and you are asking for my GPA? You do know that the eye color is a better predictor of job performance than GPA, right? Do not judge an individual on the ability to memorize and regurgitate which, let’s be honest, is the bulk of the undergraduate GPA. Do you weigh the GPA based on candidates’ Alma Mater or difficulty of the courses? No, you do not. Are you aware that students engage in “GPA preserving behaviors,” enrolling in classes with positively skewed grade distributions and withdrawing from courses at a slightest hint of a bad grade? I doubt it. Are you familiar with the tier system and nonuniform grade inflation? Do you know which colleges have a Grade Forgiveness Policy? How can you tell if the 3.95 GPA is representative of an individual’s academic aptitude, or is merely a consequence of the test bank at his/her fraternity/sorority? You cannot. Which is why not only must you not consider GPA in your hiring process, you must not even ask for it. I understand that for many (under)graduates GPA is the only distinguishing characteristic, in which case limited use of this misguided statistic is somewhat permissible. However, considering the GPA of a candidate who has graduated years ago is much like appraising a house by its pictures from when it was first built. The degree to which academic success translates into professional success is left untouched, it shall be explored later.
Lesson Two: If you ask about my employment gaps, I cannot take you seriously.
A fraction of employers firmly believe that a gap in employment signifies unexpected dismissal, lack of planning, performance-hampering problems of unspecified nature, e.g. jail, illness, rehabilitation, etc. Some employers refuse to interview candidates with employment gaps [sometimes] claiming candidates’ skills have degraded, others will question candidates about it. First, if you cannot verify expertise during an interview – reevaluate your interview practices. Second, there are many kosher reasons for interrupted employment – parental leave or, more commonly, a year at an undisclosed location studying the Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique. Ultimately, however, it is none of your business. Continuous employment is a choice, not a requirement. If you are hiring someone on an “at will” basis, you have no right to demand an explanation of their discontinuous employment. Would you tolerate candidates inquiring about your turnover rate? Your layoff practices? Or why you appear to be hiring half of a department worth of staff only a few months after making the national “Top Ten Layoff Leaders” list? You can fire me at any time for any/no reason, why must I pretend that I will work for you until I die?
Lesson Three: If you reject all but the perfect candidates, you will be understaffed forever.
If you tell me that I fit seventy-three criteria for the position, but unfortunately have five years of experience instead of the required six – I will recommend that you replace your head of recruiting. With companies’ products and services becoming ever more narrow/specialized, it is ever more difficult to find an applicant who has already had a similar job somewhere else, and therefore possesses all of the skills/knowledge required. If you refuse to train new employees all the while complaining about your inability to find qualified candidates, burden on your current employees will increase, they will feel the pressure of 60-70hr weeks and eventually quit. Now you’re helpless because you can’t train newcomers even if you wanted to.
Epilogue.
The lessons are derived from facts on the ground and garnished with hyperbolae for easy digestion. Feel free to amuse yourself at the hyperbolae, do not ignore the facts. Superficial criteria increase both false negatives and false positives thus diluting the applicant pool. Which means that either the caliber of your average hire decreases, or the time required to hire a competent employee increases, or both.
False Metrics 